.Publisher's Note: The complying with is the text of a letter from Trip 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reflecting on the events of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed significantly concerning specifics of the mission throughout the month I have actually been actually listed here, generally for 2 reasons: the very first being that there has actually been actually very little opportunity to perform that type of composing, and furthermore, given that I'm not sure just how pleasant I am sharing ideas I show to family and friends with the rest of the planet.Effectively, definitely the planet altered today. What I say or even perform is quite small contrasted to the implication of what happened to our nation today when it was actually attacked by ... through whom? Revolutionaries is all we know, I suppose. Difficult to know at whom to drive our rage and fear ...I had actually just ended up a number of jobs this morning, one of the most time-consuming being actually the physical examinations of all crew participants. In a personal discussion observing that, the air travel specialist told me they were having a really negative time on the ground. I had no tip ...He illustrated the situation to me as ideal he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was astonished, then horrified. My first idea was that this wasn't a true talk, that I was still listening closely to one of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply didn't seem achievable on this incrustation in our country. I couldn't even picture the details, also prior to the headlines of more destruction started coming in.Vladimir came over rather swiftly, picking up that something incredibly serious was being actually gone over. I swayed Michael into the module at the same time. They were also impressed as well as stunned. After we signed off, I made an effort to reveal to Vladimir and also Michael as ideal I could possibly the prospective enormity of this particular act of fear in downtown New york and also at the Pentagon. They clearly knew and were actually quite compassionate.I eyed the Globe Chart on the pc to view where over the globe our company were actually and also noticed that we were happening southeast out of Canada and will be skipping New England in a handful of mins. I zoomed around the terminal up until I found a window that will give me a perspective of New York City and snatched the nearest video camera. It took place to become a video camera, and also I was actually appearing southern from the home window of Michael's cabin.The smoke seemed to be to possess a strange bloom to it at the base of the pillar that was streaming south of the metropolitan area. After going through one of the news articles our company merely obtained, I think we were taking a look at NY around the amount of time of, or even shortly after, the crash of the 2nd high rise. Exactly how awful ...I swung the video camera during the East Shore to the south to observe if I can see some other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, yet nothing at all was visible.It was rather tough to deal with work after that, though our team had some to do, but on the following track our company moved across the US more southern. All 3 of us were functioning 1 or 2 cams to make an effort to get views of New york city or Washington. There was haze over Washington, yet no details resource may be viewed. Everything looked awesome from two to three hundred kilometers away. I can not think of the heartbreaking scenes on the ground.Aside from the psychological effect of our country being actually tackled as well as countless our residents as well as maybe some close friends being eliminated, the absolute most mind-boggling emotion being actually where I am is one of isolation.Following time ... I reckon the tiredness and mental strain received the very best of me. I couldn't stay awake as well as remain to write. Today was still challenging, yet our team started getting more info, plus our team had the respect of chatting directly with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, who ensured our team that the ground groups will remain to function as well as ensure our safety and security, as well as the safe function of the Place. Our team also spoke with our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, who added that the companions in the Program are actually all absolutely devoted to carrying on safe procedures and also support. These were actually never ever inquiries for me. I know all these folks! The ground teams have actually been actually very supportive, really understanding of the influence of the headlines, as well as have actually made an effort to be as helpful as possible. They have all been actually quite specialist as well as centered though I can not visualize the diversion of this particular form of information being available in and the notion that authorities structures might be in danger. They certainly never skipped a beat, also when moving nerve center. And also a group of elderly personnel and also pals provided us a rather in depth instruction on what was actually understood and what was being actually carried out in the government and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was quite useful as well as type of them to perform in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has additionally been encouraging as well as practical, making an effort to uplink news articles when our personal properties were actually inoperable, as well as stating kind phrases ...My crewmates have actually been excellent, also. They know it is actually been actually a hard day for me and also the folks on the ground, as well as they've attempted to be as even keeled and also useful as possible. Michael also repaired me my preferred Borscht soup for supper. As well as they give me loads of room to presume when I needed it. They are very considerate and naturally shocked at whoever would do this.I understand a lot of people in Washington, plenty of folks that take a trip to DC and New York City, many that are pilots, that I really felt certain I would get a minimum of a handful of pieces of trouble over the next handful of days. I acquired the very first one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that hit the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I found Chic during cadet summer season when our team remained in the D&B together, and also we had considerable amounts of courses together. I can not imagine what he has to of gone through, as well as right now I hear that he might possess climbed further than our company can even consider through perhaps avoiding his plane coming from being the one to attack the White House. What a horrendous loss, however I make certain Chic was dealing with fearlessly throughout. And also splits don't move the same in space ...It is actually tough to describe just how it experiences to become the only American totally off the world at a time such as this. The emotion that I need to be there with each one of you, taking care of this, assisting in some way, is actually mind-boggling. I recognize that our team are on the limit (or even past) of a dreadful shift in the background of the globe. Numerous factors will never ever coincide once more after September 11, 2001. Certainly not simply for the manies thousand and also countless individuals directly affected by these horrible acts of terrorism, yet possibly for everybody. We will find our own selves experiencing in different ways concerning loads of factors, including perhaps room exploration, regrettably.It's awful to view smoke cigarettes putting coming from injuries in your personal nation from such a fantastic angle. The duality of getting on a space probe devoted to enhancing daily life on the earth as well as watching life being actually ruined by such unforced, dreadful actions is jolting to the mind, no matter who you are actually. And the expertise that every thing will definitely be different than when our company released due to the time our experts land is a little bit of disconcerting. I believe in our nation and also in our management that our experts are going to do every little thing possible to much better protect her as well as our loved ones, as well as to deliver compensation of what has been actually performed. I have confidence that the excellent individuals at NASA will definitely carry out every little thing required to continue our purpose properly and also return our company safely and securely at the correct time. As well as I skip each of you quite. I can not exist along with you face to face, and also our team possess a very long way to visit accomplish our purpose, yet be actually specific that my soul is with you, and also know you are in my petitions.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An upgrade to the final letter ... Thankfully, it is actually been a busy week up listed below. And also to show that, like our country, our experts are continuing on our intended road along with company as usual (as high as possible). Tonight the most recent add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Area are going to be released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States opportunity), it will dock with our team, at a port never utilized prior to on the low point edge of the Solution Module. This new component will certainly offer us yet another place to dock a Development or even Soyuz and also are going to offer a large airlock with 2 useable hatches for administering EVA's in Russian Orlan suits, which we will certainly perform a few of before our experts return.The trouble prior to in handling this week was actually insufficient updates. The trouble right now is excessive. It arrived at one time when email was actually brought back, and also there is actually inadequate opportunity to review all of it! Plus it's as well tough to handle all of it simultaneously. But I appreciate receiving it, as well as I definitely value the fantastic characters of assistance and companionship I am actually acquiring.Our experts are flourishing aboard, obtaining our work performed, as well as discussing factors. Last night we possessed a lengthy conversation over dinner regarding the implication of these events, the achievable actions to follow, as well as what must be carried out. After supper, Michael resolved informing me that every e-mail he received coming from pals in Russia pointed out especially to inform me how regretful they were actually that this occurred, stretching their acknowledgements, and asking just how I was performing. Vladimir instructed me the Russian word for "condolences" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar City. (Both the Russian and also the English terms are actually considerably very lengthy to pronounce quickly.) Extremely kind individuals.For the final two days, the Russian MCC has sufficed to transfer online broadcasts of radio information concerning the occasion as well as affiliated tales, to see to it I was well notified. Every expert who has begun free throw line to cover a treatment or even a problem contends some factor stretched greetings to me with kind phrases. Tonight the Russian capcom told us that as a result of the wedding day of remembrance in the United States, all day folks had been actually delivering flowers and edging all the wall structures of the United States consulate in Moscow, and also this night they were lighting candle lights in the street outside the consular office. How the globe has changed.People all over seem to acknowledge the senselessness and also terror within this attack. As well as the enormous reduction. Moscow has handled these sort of troubles in the final handful of years with condo as well as metro bombings, so they are actually as restless to get rid of this hazard as our company are. However the bottom collection is actually that there are actually excellent individuals almost everywhere who desire to live in calmness. I go through that a youngster talked to, "The United States is actually so excellent to other nations, our team constantly assist everyone, exactly how can they loathe our company a lot?".I wish the example of teamwork and also count on that this spacecraft and all the people in the plan demonstrate daily will someday influence the rest of the globe to work similarly. They must!Sadly, we will not be actually flighting over the United States while individuals are actually igniting candle lights. Do not know if we might view that in any case. We performed, however, see a really unusual and gorgeous view a couple of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz booster. We were actually overtaking it as well as it came into view regarding 3 mins after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunlight reached our terminal, so it was still at night. It appeared like a huge comet along with a directly, broad tail silhouetted versus the darker earth below. In spite of some negative illumination for a while as the sun reached our home window at a reduced position, I handled some video recording of it as first our team passed the spacecraft, and after that enjoyed it begin to catch up as it acquired elevation and also speed. I recorded up until major motor deadline and enhancer splitting up happened equally we moved toward dawn on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable sight in a memorable full week ...Lifestyle happens, even in space. Our experts are actually here to keep ... Frank.